LDS Tries to Heal Post Prop 8 Rifts

Diane Oviatt held her sobbing gay son in a darkened kitchen as he poured out years of grief at the secret he had been carrying for 18 years and wondered how he would get to heaven without marrying.

These were among the anguished stories several Mormons shared during emotional church services Oakland LDS Stake held last summer to heal rifts caused by the faith’s activism in the Golden State on behalf of traditional marriage.

In June 2008, the LDS First Presidency asked all California Mormons to give their time and money to Proposition 8, a ballot measure striking down gay marriage. Many members did so with gusto, circulating petitions, raising money, sending e-mails to church lists and putting up lawn signs.

That left other Bay Area Mormons, particularly those with gay friends and relatives, feeling embattled and alienated. Some stepped away temporarily from church; others left for good. Those who remained often felt at odds with fellow believers.

‘What’s the point of going on?’

“I assured [Ross] of our love and understanding, our unwavering support and loyalty, but when, in absolute despair, he said, ‘What’s the point of going on? I can’t ever marry in the temple and have a family. How do I get to the celestial kingdom? What happens to me?’ I had no answers. I still don’t.

“I could not advise him to keep coming to church, to hope for peace in the next life. There are graveyards full of young Latter-day Saints who have tried.

“I choose life for my child. I would rather have him alive, living an authentic life, true to who he is, than to live a stalwart steadfast lie that backs him into a suicidal corner.”

Diane Oviatt

More at: Salt Lake Tribune!