eHarmony Settles Gay Discrimination Suite

According to a post in WSJ blogs:

eHarmony, Inc., which runs an online dating service for heterosexual couples, must now cater to a gay clientele. That is the upshot of a settlement the California company reached today with the New Jersey Attorney General’s Office.

In what seems like a novel claim to our ears, the Garden State asserted that eHarmony violated the state’s Law Against Discrimination by not offering a same-sex matching service. New Jersey got involved following a complaint by Eric McKinley, a gay match-seeker in the state.

eHarmony has denied violating the law, claiming that its business model has been based on its expertise to date. The company says it has researched thousands of opposite-sex marriages to understand what makes opposite-sex couples compatible.

But, as a result of the settlement, eHarmony next year will launch a same sex matching service called Compatible Partners, which will be marketed in gay and lesbian media outlets, according to a FAQ that the company released today. The document makes clear that users of eHarmony.com will not be matched with users of the new site, compatiblepartners.net.

“I applaud the decision of eHarmony to settle this case and extend its matching services to those seeking same-sex relationships,” said J. Frank Vespa-Papaleo, director of the New Jersey AG’s Division on Civil Rights.

Read the entire post by clicking here.

Wrapping My Head Around the News

I’m amazed that we will have a president who comes from a mixed race family. Someone who is used to people being confused by his name and family tree. Someone who knows what it’s like to be asked constantly, “What are you?” Someone who is even related to an Ng (Barack’s sister is Maya Soetero-Ng), which means he’s almost maybe practically related to me. Someone who has spent time with his family in Indonesia and Kenya. Someone who bothered to mention the words “gay” and “Asian” and “Native American” in his acceptance speech. I feel a remarkable sense of validation.

But I am still struggling to understand why 52 percent of California voted for Prop 8. Or why the proponents of Prop 8 put so much force behind their campaign in the first place. Who in their right mind is so fired up to deny other people rights that they already have? Where do you even get the energy to be so against something that doesn’t even negatively affect you—or anyone—at all?

Read the rest at spinthetruth.

70 Gay Men Arrested in Malaysian Raid

Unlike the 1993 Mel Brooks-directed comedy, ‘Robin Hood: Men in Tights’, an entertainment centre and two massage parlours hosted separate parties with a difference yesterday.

Apparently, the humble bathroom towel was the ‘theme’ of the three parties meant exclusively for men.

As it turned out, most of the 70 men who turned up to have fun and frolick with one another, wore just a towel, and nothing else.

The guests, including a foreigner, were allegedly participating in a ‘gay party’ meant exclusively for homosexuals.

Thus, the police were not amused when they raided the entertainment centre in Jalan Perai Jaya and the massage parlours in Pulau Tikus to find the men frolicking with their male partners, clad only in towels.

Read the rest at miamiherald.com.

Video of the Day for GLBT History Month

Make sure you check back everyday throughout the month of October for the GLBT History Month video of the day.

You can always find out more at the official GLBT History Month website.

About a Boy and His Briefs: An Interview

Making a blog is very easy, but keeping on traffic takes time and effort. I have four of them so I know what I am talking about. Blogs are a powerful tool and I think is the future: the age of the BLOGSPHERA. Voices in the blogosphera are many and right now readers stay informed with different opinions as well. This is the first interview of a special about guys, gays and blogs.

His name is Chris, a nice and very creative guy in his thirties. He lives in New York and runs a very tasteful blog called ABOUT A BOY AND HIS BRIEFS that has a little of everything. I am honored he said OK when I asked him to give me an interview for Gay Agenda, but we need to wait after he gets his afternoon massage. The interview took place via Internet chat, which took a long time, but I just had to know about Chris’ briefs. We just had to check them out, and I mean that.

Here’s how it all went down…

Toniuz1: Hi Chris, how was your massage?

abriefsboy: It sucked. $200 and an hour wasted. Oh well, better luck next time.

Toniuz1: Was it really?

abriefsboy: Yes. The guy was sexy, but his body was not as nice as I deserved, or paid for…

Toniuz1: Hope you have better luck next time buddy. I use to have a good masseuse here in my town, a straight guy but he was very good. Great hands! And he was Yummy!

Abriefsboy: Nice. I had one too. I should have gone to him… but its in the city so I thought why not try this…

Toniuz1: You live in New York right?

abriefsboy: In queens. Maybe I should post an ad…and pimp myself out. I could do a much better massage than he did.

Toniuz1: I bet you can. I would pay for that for sure. LOL

abriefsboy: LOL

Toniuz1: Let’s get to know Chris, how old are you?

abriefsboy: 33

Toniuz1: Where are you from?

abriefsboy: Originally Illinois, but I’ve been in NYC going on 11 years.

Toniuz1: The Big City. Do you like it?

abriefsboy: I do, a lot.

The debate was about to start and Chris wanted to watch it, so he said to go slow with the interview… I was happy!

Toniuz1: Would you like to do the interview another time?  When you have time?

abriefsboy: Well I’m eating right now. And the debate is about to start.

Toniuz1: So, will it be better tomorrow afternoon?

abriefsboy: Yeah I think so. I’ll be online most of the day.

Toniuz: Where do you work?

abriefsboy: I work for a university, but for the past 3 months I’ve been home in bed. I was hit by a minivan while crossing the street.

Toniuz1: I read that in your blog sorry to hear that. You said you work for a university. so are you a professor?

Abriefsboy: No, I work in student services.

Toniuz1: Do you enjoy your job?

abriefsboy: No. I’m looking to change paths as well as starting a couple biz ideas of my own.

Toniuz1: What kind of job would like to have? Or what kind of business?

abriefsboy: Listen. I need to watch this debate. So I may answer you slowly. Capisce?

Toniuz1: OK, capisce

abriefsboy: I want to get back into personal assistant…executive assistant and my biz ideas are numerous. But I’d like to start an online bakery; put some of my collages on t-shirts to sell, design underwear for guys and finish writing several books I’ve started.

Toniuz1: You have a lot of ideas. You are very creative Chris and by the way I love men’s underwear and men of course LOL

abriefsboy: There are a few for you on my blog.

Toniuz1: Yeah, I’ll take a look. Thanks LOL

abriefsboy: I’d also like to own a landscaping biz, buy a farm and renovate it, turn it into a self sufficient farm.

Toniuz1: Very nice, what do you write about?

abriefsboy: I write fantasies, as well as memoir type things. Rants and raves.

Toniuz1: You are full of ideas and projects. You Have a busy mind and I also see you have nice such a body. Mind and body, the perfect combination. How often do you train?

abriefsboy: Well thanks, but It’s been hard since the accident: usually 6 days a week.

Toniuz1: How important is it for you to have a good body?

abriefsboy: It’s important. I mean I started working out when I tested positive. It was something for me to focus on. Something other than being positive and keep my body looking good. Even though I have this virus inside me for the rest of my life. So wanting to keep a healthy body, changing my eating habits. I still gorge on junk food and love smoking weed but I rarely drink. I don’t use many drugs and when I do they are few and far between. I practice yoga, try to meditate. Just trying to live.

Toniuz1: You are trying to live a healthy life and that’s all right. So did you start writing your blog About a boy and his briefs after you tested positive?

abriefsboy: No I started the blog because my blog father told me to.

Toniuz1: Your blog father? Never heard that word before

abriefsboy: He said to create a blog. I think because when we met online…we talked every day…I think he got sick of hearing me chatter…so he said to create a blog. This is my blog father’s blog - http://myveryrandomthoughts.blogspot.com/

Toniuz1: He gave you a great idea. I read your profile. It says you consider yourself a lot of things.

abriefsboy: My profile says quite a bit. So… lets see. Chris has OCD, he is depressed, frustrated. Usually melancholy. Chris loves his dog so much, at times more than he should.
Chris was bored with the debate so his attention was completely on the Interview.

Toniuz1: Miss Moxie is a lucky doggie

abriefsboy: Yes, she is. Now ask all the questions… I’ll answer one by one. I’ll be watching this debate tomorrow as well with my other roommate. More about me Chris was raped. Chris was in prison. Chris loves black men. Ask away.

Toniuz1 : Step by step. Ok?

abriefsboy: ok…

Toniuz1: I think everybody can be a lot of things but it depends more on your state of mind or the moment you are living.

abriefsboy: True. I believe I’m empathic. I’m a highly sensitive person that becomes quite affected by the energy around me. It’s why I spend a lot of time by myself and I don’t have a lot of friends.

Toniuz1: Good friends are good, but in quality not quantity.

abriefsboy: I know a number of people, but the ones I trust I can count with one hand.

Toniuz1: You told me about being raped and being in prison. I suppose it was part of you growing up? How did it affect you?

abriefsboy: I went to jail when I was 19. I was raped a few years later. I was 22 or so.

Toniuz1: So, did it make you a stronger person?

abriefsboy: That which doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger.

Toniuz1: A survivor

Toniuz1: Do you hide being HIV positive?

abriefsboy: I had too many issues with people not knowing and freaking out, but it’s usually the ones that don’t know their own status that freak out when they find out mine.

Toniuz1: How does dating work for you? Do you look up HIV positive people like you?

abriefsboy: Not particularly. I mean why limit myself. If they have an issue with my status that’s their problem not mine. I’m healthy, undetectable. I don’t look sick or act sick. I take my meds. I play safe, so if a guy has a problem with my status. I don’t need it or deserve it.

Toniuz1: There’s still a lot of ignorance and taboo about HIV, but if you play safe there is nothing to be afraid of.

abriefsboy: Yup. That’s why I’m honest.

Toniuz1: I can see you’re just a person trying to do his best. You have roommates and a dog. But do you miss to having a partner?

abriefsboy: I wish I had a boyfriend. I wish my family were closer. But yes, I have 3 roommates: 1 is gay and 2 are straight. 1 girl. 1 boy… but he’s on his way out.

Toniuz1: Good team

Toniuz1: Most of people who get infected need support, in your case not having a boyfriend or being close to your family? How has that worked out?

abriefsboy: Well, I lived here when I became positive. One of my brothers and my sister know. My parents don’t.

Toniuz1: Are all of them living in Illinois?

abriefsboy: Yup.

Toniuz1: I consider my blogs my babies. You said your blog father motivated you. So how important is your blog for you?

abriefsboy: When I don’t blog I get upset. It’s a lifeline. It’s a place for me to vent, to create and be creative.

Toniuz1: and keep working

abriefsboy: Yes

Toniuz1: You always have a project going on…

abriefsboy: Well, I want to do my online bakery… about a boy and his bakery and do a blog along with it. I also want to start selling my t-shirts on my blog as well. I’d like to do more photo shoots once I get my body back up to par.

Toniuz1: I bet you love cooking and making bread.

abriefsboy: Yes. I do enjoy doing it. I even like doing dishes, but I haven’t in a while.

Again the debate and politics now

Toniuz1: still there?

abriefsboy: Yes I’m here. Sorry the debate can be engrossing at times. I just hate McCain so much.

Toniuz1: If you could stand up in front of them, what would you say?

abriefsboy: I’d ask McCain to sit down and drop out of the race for the good of the land and tell Obama to get going on all his promises, make it real…don’t make it fluff…

Toniuz1: And what about gay rights?

abriefsboy: Well. I think there are more important things at this moment. I think that if he stays out of it, and by that I mean dealing with them. Let the states do what they want. Eventually the nation will change. I think gay rights are important. I like what Obama says more than McCain, but I don’t see eye to eye with all his views. I’m willing to give the guy a try. The lesser of two evils. Gay rights will come. I know this. They crested the hill.

Toniuz1: Yes, I hope so

abriefsboy: And it’s all down hill from here, but things like the economy, environment and healthcare are standing in the countries of the world and here at home. I am a big believer that we shouldn’t help abroad so much. I’m sorry when we have job loss and bad environment and bad protection here at home. People are hungry and homeless in this country and I don’t think we pay enough attention to us. I’m not saying to close us off from the rest of the world, but I have a really hard time with our high and mighty attitude thinking we are better than the rest of the world and we are not. We were once, maybe, but we have fallen in the eyes of the world in our strength, our independence, our creativity and industry.

Toniuz1: So now is time to look inside and make changes for better.

abriefsboy: We are not what we once were…and I love history. We are a great nation. We can be better. We need to be better. We deserve better. Once we are ‘fixed’ then lets go out and help the world where it needs it not where we think help is needed. We are so flippin’ arrogant, humans in general…and Americans but I’m sure it’s where you live.

Toniuz1: I had a boyfriend and when I visited him he had a flag hanging in the wall on the back of the bed.

abriefsboy: No way. I do have a flag somewhere and we hung it outside after 9/11, but my country disappoints me now. We don’t take pride in our country or ourselves. We think if we help others they won’t look at what’s back here and you need a good foundation before you can build a house. The same is with a society. We had it. We need to regain it.

Toniuz1: Do you think young people in your country like politics?

abriefsboy: Well. I think they have to this time around. It’s a very important time. A lot of things can change in the next few years depending on who is in office, but if McCain wins… I might leave the states for a while.

Toniuz1: Would you leave USA? COME TO PERU!!! LOL

abriefsboy: Okay… never been.

Close up and more personal

Toniuz1: When did you come out of the closet? Was it easy for you?

abriefsboy: I came out to my sis first when I was 18 or maybe 21, then when I got out of boot camp(prison) I came out to almost everyone. No one had a problem with it. It wasn’t a big deal. I was already a black sheep, vegetarian, artist, and the boy that read books and didn’t play sports. I didn’t kiss a boy until I was 22. I didn’t screw a guy until I was 25 and I didn’t get screwed until I was 26. There you go.

Toniuz1: Have you ever fallen in love?

abriefsboy: I fell in love with a guy while I lived in Illinois and I don’t think I’ve been in love since.

Toniuz1: Most gays guys want to have sex before dating.  Do you consider sex to be that important? Is it The Main Thing?

abriefsboy: It’s not the main thing, but its very important. I think you need to test drive a car before you buy it.

Toniuz1: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

abriefsboy: No. Well, but what kind of relationship would that be. I mean I want a lover as well as a best friend. How’s that? Is this the interview? lol.

Toniuz1: It is. I wanted people to get to know Chris the author of ABOUT A BOY AND HIS BRIEFS, the whole package.

abriefsboy: okay.

Toniuz1: Are you looking for love now?

abriefsboy: I’m not Looking…but if I happen to stumble upon it I’m not going to deny it… I’ve liked guys…I’ve thought I’ve been in love but nothing has felt like tony… I don’t compare guys to him…

Toniuz1: Tony… uhm… how long were you together?

abriefsboy: 3 years. He was straight though. It was a sexless relationship.

Toniuz1: With gay rights and gay marriage being an issue in your nation and a worldwide topic, would you like to get married one day?

abriefsboy: Yes, I would like to get married

Toniuz1: But a marriage with all the benefits

abriefsboy: Of course. I deserve to be as miserable as straight people.

Toniuz1: So you will vote in November?

abriefsboy: Yes. It’s my duty.

Toniuz1: What are you proud of in your life? And what are you disappointed or frustrated about?

abriefsboy: Lots.

Toniuz1: What is your worst fear?

abriefsboy: Dying alone. Actually… no. My worst fear: torture, heights and deep water.

Toniuz1: Do you have a will?

abriefsboy: I have a living will in the works.

Toniuz1: Do you like watching TV shows?

abriefsboy: Oh yes. Especially since I’ve been home.

Toniuz1: Which ones?

abriefsboy: Oh gosh. Favorites right now are…fringe, sordid lives, heroes, weeds, and mad men! I like a lot of things, some reality shows as well. I like Rachel Zoë project

Toniuz1: Movies? Music?

abriefsboy: I’m not a big music fan and I’ve not been to a movie since the accident

Toniuz1: and books?

abriefsboy: I’m a big fantasy freak.

abriefsboy: I love my wizards and dragons and stuff, but I read self help and spiritual type things… just depends try to do a book a week.

Toniuz1: Coach life?

abriefsboy: Yeah…

Toniuz1: I can think about Chris as a big fantasy freak. Is that a good definition?

abriefsboy: Yes. That’s about right.

Toniuz1: I enjoyed the interview very much. Thank you.

abriefsboy: Thank you and hope to read the material soon.

Toniuz1: Say hello to Miss Moxie, she is so cute

abriefsboy: Yes she is… she had her teeth cleaned today.

Toniuz1: I bet she is great company

abriefsboy: yeahh!! She is. I gotta let her out. I’ll see ya later buddy. Bye!

Toniuz1: Bye Chris and keep the briefs LOL

abriefsboy: Gotta go make it LOL

Check it his blog at: http://aboutaboyandhisbriefs.blogspot.com/

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